'Tis I Spartacus,
I expect you have all missed me so I thought I would pen a few lines to cheer you all.
I am afraid that my misgivings about online dating have proved correct. There will soon be a pattering of tiny hooves up here at the Goaterie Coterie!
I am sure everyone will be delighted even if it means that our sleep will be disturbed by the light snoring of our esteemed poo sweeper upper, Tracy. She feels, I suppose, duty bound to sleep near the mother to be. As a result we are all a little short of space but she means well.
Naturally as Head Male Goat I will be on hand to offer advice, even though Myrtle seems to think that she is the best mentor.
On another note, my coat will soon be acquiring some rather fetching blonde streaks, as soon as the sun shines, which surely will be soon? I'm only hoping that visiting ladies will manage to exert some self control as I am quite irresistible!